My word is my bond

A friend of mine told me that in the old days, stockbrokers operating at the London Stock Exchange were executing transactions without written contracts or other legal documents. Every stockbroker was expected to honour his side of the bargain. Indeed since 1801, the London Stock Exchange’s motto is “My word is my bond”.

The London Stock Exchange worked on the principle of trust and honour. Break the trust and you lose your honour in the stockbroking community. The result is that no one will deal with you thereafter.

The Bible exhorts Christians to abide by their own undertakings: “Let your yea be yea; and your nay, nay” (Jas 5:12b). The Lord Jesus Christ said: “Let your communication be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay: for whatsoever is more than these cometh of evil (Matt 5:37). So if a Christian gives an undertaking and subsequently breaches it, it is evil. Perhaps a Christian’s motto should be “My word is my bond”.

But some may ask, “What about the wife? Should she be privy to things that the husband has given an undertaking of confidentiality? Is the husband expected to tell his wife such information? Recently I came across an article (online.worldmag.com/2009/06/10/tell-your-wife-everything/) where the author disagrees. An undertaking once given should be honoured. It is the “My word is my bond” principle again.

But what about religious leaders like pastors, elders, etc? I once heard a pastor saying: “God calls me to be a pastor. God did not call my wife to be my co-pastor or deputy pastor”. How many wives of religious leaders assume such a role today? By doing so, they expect to be told by their religious leader husbands all the confidential information gleaned through counselling sessions, for example. Is this biblical? I doubt it.

But what exactly are the duties of a religious leader’s wife? Well I read another article on this subject (www.credenda.org/issues/12-2femina.php) recently. This article is written by a pastor’s wife. In it she said that first and foremost, “a pastor’s wife should keep the pastor her number-one priority, not the church. Her ministry is to him and secondly to their children. This means keeping his needs foremost in her plans and in her mind. The pastor’s wife is no different from any Christian wife on this point, no matter what the husband’s calling”.

 She goes on to say that a pastor’s wife is not automatically the head of the women’s ministry, nor is she the church’s hostess or the church’s office. She also does not set the standard for dress or behaviour. She is also not the social organizer for the church. Wow! I wonder how many wives of religious leaders realize all this.